Scared to be hopeful!

So basically I’ve had chronic pain in my back, neck and shoulders for almost 5 years now. No doctor or medical test has been able to diagnose the issue.

Yet, the past 2 weeks the pain has been different. Almost like things are getting better… But I’m scared to be hopeful that things are finally improving.

Over the past 5 years, I’ve had so many doctors say they can help me. I get my hopes up and start feeling positive and hopeful, to then, a few months down the line, realise that things are no better and they aren’t going to be the one to cure me!

The past few weeks a lot of things have changed in my life. I’m no longer a primary teacher-I’m now a full time personal trainer, which I love. I’ve also reduced the amount of training I do on my upper body and I’ve been strengthening my glutes on the advice of a physio working on a knee injury.

So what is it that has made the difference?  All of them combined or none of them?  Am I just imagining a difference.

I’m so scared to be hopeful.

I don’t want another let down.

Not sure I can handle another let down.

So for now, I’ll keep quiet and silently hopeful. I’ve had pain for 5 years so a few more weeks/months of this I can handle… But I still have all my fingers and toes crossed for a recovery.

I’ll keep you posted.

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